We’re gearing up for yet another fabulous chicken processing day (when aren’t we gearing up for another fabulous chicken processing day?) and I’ve been having fantasies about art directing a photo shoot of it for the blog.
I envision a bunch of rustic, groovy “urban woodsmen” farmer types standing around the butchering table smiling over life’s simple pleasures as we lovingly eviscerate poultry between sips of spiked apple cider.
In this fantasy, I see myself in the outfit below: A chic, expensive plaid shirt, sexy cat eye frames and hotter-than-hot leggings, leg warmers and Frye boots. A childlike beanie hat will adorn my head to convey that I’m not trying too hard. The butchering gloves and apron give the sartorial tableau some verisimilitude.
Now…lets compare it to the reality.
Here’s what I ACTUALLY wear when butchering chickens. See: The blindingly white sneakers paired with black bicycle socks and canvas Carharrt pants, a crusty old tee shirt, messy apron and work gloves. Plus donuts. We always eat donuts on processing day.
As you can see, I can’t do a rustic/indie photo shoot of processing day because there is just no way to make this event look cool.
{ 18 comments… read them below or add one }
You will look good in anything, given your sleek yoga-fit body!
Your nice tennis shoes might not look so good by the time you are done with the chickens….
Um, nobody looks good in the Carharrt/white running shoe combo. NOBODY.
They’d both fit right in here in greater Portlandia.
Just add bloodstained rain pants.
Donuts are a non-negotiable part of butchering days around here as well. That’s typically my job – arrive with donuts, a spare whetstone, and another round of food-saver bags.
Oh, I don’t know. Carharrts look pretty sexy tucked into these camo rubber boots (this is my field attire, by the way): http://www.lacrossefootwear.com/performance/hunt/rubber/all-season/women-s-alphaburlyr-sport-mossy-oakr-break-upr-hunting-boots.html
Just throw in a carharrt hat and you’re all set! (my husband did tell me this weekend that he saw someone with a ‘cool’ carharrt hat – so maybe there’s hope).
Those camo boots are my standard farm footwear a well. I heartily endorse them.
My question – are the donuts from Wal-mart or do you splurge for the Pure Eats donuts? Because those little delights would really class up butchering day.
We do Krispy Kreme!
A true Southern classic.
Too bad we don’t have a store around here to get them hot and fresh.
I thought of you all today. Tom went over to a friend’s house to help them butcher some turkeys, one of which will be our Thanksgiving bird. New experience for him and Roman even went along and saw the job done. I’m now doubly excited to eat on Thanksgiving!
Sounds so delicious.
Man, if you could up here and help me with My Butchering Day (of turkeys), I would probably buy you the cool outfit. Just sayin.
Do donuts make it any easier? cuz I might hafta look into that. Cheers, sistah.
I just discovered you in your article “The Incredible Journey” in LHJ. Before I was even done I had to find your blog that you mentioned in the article, and boy, am I glad I did! I’ve just read the first few posts, but you’ve already made me laugh a time or two.
Looking forward to exploring the rest of the site…
Thanks, Lindsay!
You may want to consider the glasses though.. I mean… didn’t you tell us that poo eye is a hazzard?
Jake is the one who makes “the final cut” so he should probably wear protective lenses. I so far have been spared the poo in the eye look. Now watch, having written that, it’s probably coming.
Oh, Frye boots…my heart is skipping beats.
I LOOOOVE Frye boots but, man, are they expensive!
SO expensive that I only look at them through the window. For me it’s best NOT to try them on. I bet they feel as good as they look though. sigh.