I’m nearly 3 1/2 weeks into my consumption diet and so far it’s going well…save for two glitches.
The first was forgetting to pack underwear for my trip to New York to appear on The Katie Show. I suppose I didn’t have to admit this lapse on national television before an audience of 2.5 million, not to mention to Katie Couric herself, but where is the fun in that?
I broke down and bought some Jockeys after the taping once Katie Couric herself gave me permission to treat myself like the high class lady I am and go buy some skivvies already. I feel like a pampered princess now.
The other glitch occurred about a week ago as I attempted to clean the living room and was met with a powerful burning odor accompanied by billows of smoke coming from our 1982 vacuum cleaner. I don’t know what I sucked up — a ball of twine? a small person? — but whatever it was, it killed the vacuum. It’s just as well because that thing was a piece of crap; for every four Solha hairs it sucked up, it left six behind. Because living amid great piles of white dog hair is not an option, I broke down again and after some careful research invested in this sleek, red baby right here. Fierce, right?
That’s when you know you’re riding the silver bullet of sophistication and glamour — when you purchase Jockey underwear and a new vacuum and call it “fierce.”
Other than those two lapses, call me Obi Wan Kenobi. The surprising thing is, I don’t feel deprived. It hasn’t been a full month so it’s still too early to extol the virtues of ascetic living, but so far, I enjoy not shopping and selecting and deciding. I feel slightly more clear….less burdened. Once the acquisition of new stuff is off the table, the desire for it goes away. That’s what I’m telling myself anyway. You buy it?