For the heavy drinker in your life

I love this time of year when my mailbox becomes stuffed with all sorts of glorious catalogs featuring wonderfully exciting crap I didn’t realize I needed.

Jake and I came across this little gem in the Kotula (”The Guys With the Goods”) catalog last night. It will make a dandy gift for the heavy drinker in your life.

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It’s called the GIANT WINE GLASS ($12.99) and it holds an entire bottle wine — “Just the thing for a cozy night in,” reads the copy.

You know those nights when you’re at a friend’s house and everyone is slowly, politely sipping their wine but you can’t help but guzzle yours because you think you might have a little problem? No?  I don’t know anything about that either. But you’re too embarrassed to say “More please” because you know everyone already thinks you’re a drunk?  The Giant Wine Glass removes this painful social stigma. The Giant Wine Glass allows you to slump in your Lay-Z-Boy and drink an entire bottle of your favorite Fetzer without having to get up once. No one can say, “There goes ‘Jezzie,’ helping herself to another glass of my $7.99 wine.” No one will notice how drunk you are.   No one will notice you, period.  Not if you stay very, very quiet and sip your “grape drank” like the refined and sophisticated lady you are.  Shhh. I won’t tell anyone. Your secret is safe with me. Happy Holidays.

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11 Responses to “For the heavy drinker in your life”

  1. oh, jessie. JESSIE! i actually covered my mouth in shock and awe whilst reading this post. even checked the link, just to confirm. damn.

  2. Virginia B. says:

    Your description of getting that next glass is spot on… This would solve it all. :)

  3. Aftercancer says:

    I wanted to let you know that you’ve been picked up by Gawker, congrats! Love the glass, I wonder how many I should order?

  4. Kelly says:

    I can think of several folks that would think this was the PERFECT drink…er…gift

  5. paula says:

    i’m so glad you turned me on to this catalog. i finally found this thing i’ve been looking for FOREVER but couldn’t find:

    http://www.kotulas.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/ProductDisplay?catalogId=10051&storeId=10001&productId=12245&langId=-1&parent_category_rn=14551&top_category=10134

  6. [...] giant wine glass holds an entire bottle of wine and certain people who shall remain nameless could really put it to good use, especially on a [...]

  7. Delvon Krinkle says:

    Do they make one of these for malt liquor?

  8. Jon says:

    Check out the video they just put on the product page (your link) at kotulas.com…very funny. Or you can see it here:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K45b0×4brLw

  9. Jessie K says:

    Ha! Funny!

  10. [...] out of small wine glasses. This post on Jezebel today made me laugh so hard I almost started to hiccup. Truth be told, since having had the flu I have been drinking considerably less and it’s been something of a non-event. But then I also wasn’t drinking out of a wine glass that held a whole bottle! [rurally screwed] [...]

  11. Amy K says:

    This is great…they also have a Giant Beer Glass that holds up to five cans of beer! I’ll get the wine glass and buy the beer glass for my husband!

    http://www.kotulas.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/ProductDisplay?catalogId=10051&storeId=10001&productId=14347&langId=-1&parent_category_rn=13055&top_category=10096

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