It’s catsup, not ketchup

I hereby eradicate the word “ketchup” from my vocabulary. Henceforth, it shall be known in my household as catsup, the way God intended it.

I don’t know the etymology of the word “ketchup,” but to me it’s synonomous with the achingly sweet stuff from Heinz.

Ketchup is probably the most widely used condiment in America, yet it’s never been fully embraced by foodies or considered on par with mustard or mayonnaise. Think about it: Mustard-philes and mayo-fans have multiple gourmet  options to choose from. Ketchup fans? They get Hunts or Heinz, both of which bastardize this most perfect of condiments.

How did what began as a lively, concentrated tomato sauce become so dull? So insipid? So jejune?

I’m on a mission to reclaim this awesome condiment. And it starts with the White House Cookbook, my new favorite cooking guide published in 1926. Check out their selections of ketchups, I mean, catsups:

Tomato catsup

Green tomato catsup

Walnut catsup  (I make this first!)

Osyter catsup

Mushroom catsup

Gooseberry catsup

Cucumber catsup

Currant catsup

Apple catsup

And yeah, one of these days I’m going to get a life.